Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts

Thursday, 20 August 2026

Meet David: Turning Family Loss into a Mission to Fight Diabetes

From diabetes.org/blog

This story discusses the loss of loved ones due to diabetes complications

In 2013, diabetes took my brother, Henry. Henry was an all-star athlete who played collegiate soccer. He was also the closest thing I had to a father figure. By the time he passed away, diabetes had stolen so much from him. After losing a leg to amputation, he spent his final years confined to a wheelchair. Watching someone so full of life slowly lose his independence was heartbreaking.

Just one year later, diabetes claimed my sister Mary. Mary was an elementary school teacher who loved her students. Like Henry, she had begun losing pieces of herself to the disease, including several toes. A week before she died, we sat together over dinner when she looked at me through tears and said, "The doctor just prescribed me a new medication that's going to cost more than $400 a month. I don't know how I'm going to pay for it." A few days later, while working a school event, she wasn't feeling well. Not wanting to alarm anyone or cause a scene, she quietly walked to her car to rest. She was found there unresponsive. Diabetes had taken another member of my family. 

Then, last summer, my sister Carmen earned her wings. Carmen had spent her career caring for others as a traveling nurse. Before she passed away, diabetes had taken her eyesight, several of her toes, and eventually her independence. She endured dialysis three times every week before losing her battle. I watched all three of my siblings slowly decline because of the same disease. Today, every one of my siblings, including me, lives with type 2 diabetes. We know the constant highs and lows of blood sugar, the pain of neuropathy, and the uncertainty that accompanies every doctor's appointment. 

The disease continues to affect the next generation as well. Two of Henry's sons are now facing devastating complications. One is losing his vision and can no longer work. The other recently spent six months in the hospital and survived only after what doctors described as a "hail Mary" miracle. For my family, diabetes isn't a statistic. It is our story. 


Yet, in the middle of all that grief, something unexpected happened. As a former English teacher, I had always believed in the power of literacy. One afternoon while driving home, I prayed a simple prayer: "God, if You want me to do something different with my life, put it in my heart...right now." That prayer changed everything. In that moment, I was inspired to write The Adventures of Exo and Cy, a children's book that follows Exo and his dog Cy (exercise) through the town of O.B. (obesity), where Mayor Diane Beeties (diabetes) wants everyone to live unhealthy lives. The story encourages children to move while they read through built-in exercise activities and teaches healthy eating, physical activity, and the importance of literacy. That book eventually grew into Trail Tales, an initiative that places my stories on signs along park trails so families can read together while walking and exercising. 

Today, those projects have become my way of fighting back against the disease that has devastated my family. They have also allowed me to advocate for diabetes awareness across the country. 

Through my family’s experience with diabetes, I have learned several lessons. The most impactful lesson I’ve learned is that we are not promised tomorrow. Every day we get to spend with our loved ones is a blessing. I wish I had one more day with my brother and with my sisters. To be able to have just one more conversation. To be able to hear their laughter just one more time. Life is too valuable to let one day go to waste. I’ve also learned that if we do not care for our bodies in the present, we will ultimately pay the price in the future. As I struggle daily with my own complications, I wish I could go back in time and make the necessary changes early on so I wouldn’t have to live the life of a diabetic. Regardless, I know I’ve been placed on this journey for a purpose, and I aim to see it all the way to the end.

Diabetes has taken three of my siblings, changed the lives of my nephews, and forever altered my own journey. I cannot change what happened to my family, but I can dedicate my life to helping another family avoid the same pain. Every day, I fight for the people I love, for the people we have already lost, and for the generations whose futures still depend on what we do today.

https://diabetes.org/blog/meet-david-turning-family-loss-mission-fight-diabetes 

Wednesday, 20 May 2026

Diabetes Impacts the Whole Family: Here’s What You Can Do About It

From diatribe.org

A child or teen’s diabetes diagnosis is a life-changing event for the entire family. Here are some strategies that can help everyone take care of their mental health.

Diabetes demands a lot: constant self-management, new medications and technologies, behaviour changes, and an increased risk for long-term complications. When a child is diagnosed with diabetes, its impacts can also fall on parents and caregivers, who often provide much of the self-management, especially in younger children. It also impacts siblings, who may find themselves struggling to adapt.

Thankfully, there are amazing healthcare teams, diabetes care and education specialists, community groups, and resources that can help provide support, guidance, and helpful information for families going through this transition.

The key to this is making sure the focus isn’t just on how diabetes impacts people’s physical health or health-seeking behaviours, but also how it affects people’s mental health. 

It’s well-known that people living with diabetes are at an increased risk for diabetes distress, depression, anxiety, and stress. While research is more limited, we also know that diabetes can negatively affect the mental health of caregivers, parents, and siblings as well. This is why it is so important for the entire family to make sure they are taking steps to protect their mental health and look out for each other. This includes everything from recognizing when a child is experiencing diabetes distress to using tools to prevent caregiver and sibling burnout.

During the 2026 Diabetes + Mental Health Conference, psychologists, advocates, and researchers highlighted not just the mental health challenges that children and teens living with diabetes face, but the challenges that may affect their family members as well. The good news is, there are ways for healthcare teams and loved ones to spot and manage mental health challenges as they arise.

Parent and caregiver burnout

Oftentimes, parents or caregivers take on the majority of diabetes self-management tasks for a child who has been diagnosed. Whether it’s glucose checks, insulin administration, or carb counting, these tasks can often feel overwhelming and exhausting – especially when your child’s health is at stake. Understandably, this can lead to diabetes distress and even burnout in parents.

Diabetes distress refers to the diabetes-specific emotional burden related to things such as a fear of complications, daily management demands, and feeling overwhelmed. Diabetes burnout, on the other hand, is a state of emotional, mental, and physical exhaustion resulting from prolonged stress and diabetes distress that can lead to disengagement or reduced coping.

Research suggests that over 3 in 4 caregivers report psychological distress, and 41% report moderate-to-severe caregiver burden. This type of distress or burnout can take on a number of forms and impact families in multiple ways.

Lacee Musgrove, a licensed clinical social worker who specializes in therapy for children and teens living with diabetes, explained that when caregivers experience burnout, it can negatively impact:

  • Diabetes self-management safety (e.g., caregiver fatigue could lead to slower recognition of highs and lows)
  • Diabetes self-management consistency (e.g., missed glucose checks or insulin doses)
  • Emotional climate in the household (e.g., increased household tensions)
  • Modelling behaviours (e.g., children began to adopt or internalize their parents’ stress and coping patterns)
  • Family systems (e.g., siblings might feel overlooked, increased tension with partners, and disrupted family routines)

Musgrove stressed that caregiver burnout is common and nothing to be ashamed of. 

“If this is you, I want you to know you are not alone and there is a whole community out there that can support you," she said. "The good news is that burnout is preventable and treatable. The better news is you don't have to be perfect. All parents need to do is try their best to be there for their child."

When caregivers receive mental health support, it can improve the child’s mental health outcomes, lead to stronger family functioning, and allow for more sustainable diabetes care. 

There are lots of practical strategies that caregivers can use to help reduce or prevent distress and burnout. For example, it’s important for caregivers to normalize their own emotions and keep an eye out for early warning signs. Musgrove emphasized the importance of making space for feelings like exhaustion or frustration, while also keeping an eye out for signs of more severe burnout, such as persistent irritability, emotional numbness, and skipping meals or sleep. 

She also encouraged caregivers to prioritize small breaks and their own self-care whenever possible. When it comes to those short pauses that restore energy and resilience, this might mean relying on a partner to help split up diabetes care or encouraging the child to participate in age-appropriate self-management tasks. Regarding self-care, don’t underestimate the power of mental health support in the form of therapy, support groups, and connecting with other parents online. Being able to relate to others and share stories of success and frustration can help caregivers feel less alone.

It’s important to remember that what works for one person may not work for another, so try out multiple strategies to see which works best for you and your family.


Tips for helping siblings adjust

One area where there’s still not a ton of information is how diabetes impacts siblings.

An important concept in this topic is something called adjustment. Adjustment refers to the challenges, growth, and resilience that accompany a diagnosis. The adjustment period lasts, on average, about 1-4 months for a child who is diagnosed and 6-12 months for caregivers or parents, but it’s not known what the adjustment period is for siblings.

What experts do know is that there are several factors associated with reduced sibling adjustment, including being older in age, being exposed to higher levels of parenting stress, a child’s temperament, poor adjustment for the sibling living with diabetes, and negative perceptions about diabetes or its impact on the family. Notably, 30-38% of siblings in studies report significant emotional and behavioural problems related to coping with the impact of type 1 diabetes on the family.

Taylor Stephens, a paediatric psychologist with the Cleveland Clinic, and Meg Snyder, a paediatric psychologist with the Kennedy Krieger Institute and the Johns Hopkins Paediatric Diabetes Center, explained that there are a number of signs that can present when a sibling is experiencing adjustment difficulties. These can look different depending on the sibling’s age. 

For example, in very young children (0-6 years), adjustment difficulties might look like tantrums, separation anxiety, confusion, or attention-seeking behaviour. In school-aged children (7-10 years), it might include negative emotions around diabetes tasks or their sibling with diabetes, challenging or negative behaviours or verbal expressions, or a shifting relationship with their sibling with diabetes. In pre-teens and teens (11-18 years), it can present as increased anxiety or worry, withdrawn behaviours or irritability, downplaying concerns, mimicking parental behaviour, and seeking increased time away from home.

If there are adjustment difficulties, it’s important for parents and caregivers to remember that big feelings are expected and welcome with something as major as a diabetes diagnosis and that learning about diabetes can help with a sibling’s adjustment.

“We know that adjustment is hard, but it is temporary. It ebbs and flows and is not always linear,” said Stephens.

Stephens and Snyder provided some tips for helping siblings adjust. One strategy is best described as encourage, prepare, talk, and teach: 

  • Encourage siblings to ask questions about diabetes from a place of curiosity. 
  • Prepare them in advance when big changes or transitions to their routine are coming up. 
  • Talk about feelings without assigning judgment to whether an emotion is “good” or “bad.” 
  • Teach them about what diabetes is and how it’s managed.

Other important strategies that the experts highlighted focused on helping strengthen a sibling’s relationship to their brother or sister living with diabetes and also to their parents or caregivers. 

“Aim for honest and shared growth together as a family while also promoting childhood,” said Stephens.

This might look like making sure that neither the child with diabetes nor the sibling without it feels underappreciated, isolated, or singled out. Some ways to do this include helping the sibling engage in their brother or sister’s diabetes management tasks as appropriate, making sure that the entire family makes changes together, finding ways to connect the whole family with the diabetes community, and making sure that each child receives appropriate one-on-one time with their parents and is celebrated for their unique strengths equally.

Mental health resources for the entire family

Managing diabetes is hard, but with the right coping strategies and support, children and teens who receive a diabetes diagnosis, as well as their family members, can all protect their mental health. 

If you are living with diabetes or have a loved one or child living with diabetes, here are some helpful mental health resources:

Sunday, 10 May 2026

Talking to Loved Ones About Your Diabetes—Without Feeling Judged

From verywellmind.com

 

Key Takeaways

  • Talking about your diabetes can feel vulnerable, especially if you fear judgment.
  • Open, honest conversations can lead to stronger support and less stress.
  • By being clear about your needs, setting boundaries, and sharing your experience, you can help others understand how to support you in a way that truly helps.
                                         You can follow steps to have better conversations about your diabetes with your loved ones.

                                                                                                  DekiArt / Getty Images

Talking to a loved one about your diabetes might lead to worry about being judged, misunderstood, or treated differently when you share your diagnosis. You might even avoid the conversation altogether.

But sharing what you’re going through can help you feel less alone, and it can help others support you in the way you need. The key is learning how to talk about your diabetes in a way that feels safe, clear, and respectful of your needs.

Why These Conversations Matter

Living with diabetes is more than checking your blood sugar or taking medication. It can also bring stress, worry, fear of the future, and emotional ups and downs. Researchers call this diabetes distress, and it’s very common.

Support from family and friends can make a big difference. Studies show that strong social support can lower distress and help people stick with healthy habits like eating well and staying active. These then lead to better blood sugar control.

However, not all support feels helpful. If loved ones come across as critical or overly involved, it can actually increase stress. That’s why having these conversations matters so that you can set boundaries with them about what is most helpful for you.

Why You Might Feel Judged

If you’ve ever felt judged about your diabetes, you’re not imagining it. Research shows that people with diabetes often experience stigma, especially around food, weight, or blood sugar control.

You may experience comments like:

  • “Should you really be eating that?”
  • “Did you forget your meds again?”
  • “You just need more discipline.”

These comments can make people feel judged and uncomfortable, even if the intention behind them is to help.

Over time, this kind of judgment can increase stress and even make diabetes harder to manage.

1. Start With What You Need

Before talking to someone, take a moment to think about your goals.

Really think about what is important to you:

  • Do I want emotional support?
  • Do I want help with something specific?
  • Do I just want someone to listen?

Being clear about your needs can help guide the conversation.

It may be helpful to say:

  • “I don’t need advice right now. I just need you to listen.”
  • “It helps when you check in, but not when you tell me what to eat.”

Clear requests and boundaries can reduce confusion and help others show up in ways that actually support you. 

2. Use “I” Statements to Lower Defensiveness

When conversations feel tense, the wording matters:

  • Instead of saying: “You’re always judging me”
  • Try: “I feel discouraged when I hear comments about my food choices.”

“I” statements focus on your feelings instead of blaming the other person. This makes it easier for them to hear you without becoming defensive.

3. Share What Diabetes Really Feels Like

Many people don’t understand how complex diabetes is, and how important it is for your long-term health to manage it well. They may think it’s just about willpower or simple choices.

You can help them understand by explaining your experience:

  • “Managing diabetes requires me to make decisions all day long.”
  • “Sometimes my numbers aren’t where they need to be, even when I do everything right.”
  • “It’s not just physical, it’s mental too.”

Sharing in this way can build empathy. And that matters, because supportive relationships are linked to better emotional health and self-care in diabetes.

4. Set Boundaries (And Stick to Them)

It’s OK to set limits on what you’re comfortable discussing.

For example:

  • “I’d rather not talk about my weight.”
  • “Please don’t comment on my food unless I ask.”

Boundaries are not about pushing people away. They are about protecting your mental and emotional health.

5. Be Specific About Helpful Support

Sometimes loved ones want to help, but they just don’t know how.

Try giving clear examples:

  • “It would help if you asked how I’m doing instead of giving advice.”
  • “Taking a walk with me after dinner would be great.”
  • “Reminding me gently is OK, but not in front of others.”

Research shows that the type of support matters. Emotional support and positive interactions can improve both mood and self-care.

6. Expect It to Take Time

One conversation likely won’t fix everything. That’s normal.

People may need time to:

  • Unlearn old beliefs
  • Understand your experience
  • Adjust how they respond

If things don’t go perfectly, that doesn’t mean the conversation failed. It means you’re building a new way of communicating.

When Conversations Feel Too Hard

If talking to loved ones feels overwhelming, you’re not alone.

You might consider:

Support from peers or professionals can be just as powerful as family support, and sometimes its easier to navigate.

https://www.verywellmind.com/talking-to-loved-ones-about-your-diabetes-11969081